Is there finally hope for us mere mortals? All thanks to David who handed me a pretty color-printed reproduction of a special report on “Fall in Love and Stay That Way” from Scientific American Mind. Kate, our dining companion was intensely interested in the article and I’m sure she would have wolfed it down like me on the way home.

This report is by Dr Robert Epstein, a Harvard PHD holder in Psychology and he currently teaches at University of California. Dr Robert Epstein, if this is true I thanked you on behalf of mankind…err…just my readers.

Why is it important to learn the lessons and tips from love? Because, to quote Dr Robert, “Nothing is more fulfilling than being in a successful love relationship. Yet we leave our love lives entirely up to chance. Maybe we don’t have to anymore.” And humans don’t seem to learn very well from experiences and past mistakes; half of first marriages failed, 2/3 of second marriages failed and 3/4 of third marriages fail in the US! (And I’m sure Singapore has pretty shocking figures too!)

Here are the love-building tips and exercises:
1) Two as One. Embracing each other gently, begin to sense your partner’s breathing and gradually try to synchronize your breathing with his/her. After a few minutes, you might feel that the two of you have merged

2) Soul Grazing (Has a nice ring to it =P). Standing or sitting about two feet away from each other, look deeply into each other’s eyes, trying to look into the core of your beings. Do this for about two minutes and talk about what you saw.

3) Monkey Love. Standing or sitting fairly near each other, start moving your body in any way you like – but in a fashion that perfectly imitates your partner. This is fun but also challenging. You will both feel as if you are moving voluntarily, but your actions are also linked to those of your partner.

4) Falling In Love. A trust exercise, one of many which that increases mutual feelings of vulnerability. From a standing position, simply let yourself fall backward into the arms of your partner. Then trade places. Repeat several times and then talk about your feelings. Strangers who do this exercise sometimes feel connected to each other for years.

5) Secret Swap. Write down a deep secret and have your partner do the same. Then trade papers and talk about what you read. You can continue this process until you have run out of secrets. Better yet, save some of your secrest for another day.

6) Mind-Reading Game. Write down a thought that you want to convey to your partner. Then spend a few minutes wordlessly trying to broadcast that thought to him/her, as he or she tries to guess what it is. If she /he cannot guess, reveal what you were thinking. Then switch roles.

7) Let Me Inside. Stand about four feet away from each other and focus on each other. Every 10 seconds or so move a bit closer until, after several shifts, you are well inside each other’s personal space (about 30cm). Get as close as you can without touching.

Love Aura. Place the palm of your hand as close as possible to your partner’s palm without actually touching. Do this for several minutes, during which you will not only feel heat but also, sometimes eerie kinds of sparks.

I am going to try this and see of this truly works….after all we need all the help and tips we can to create and build fulfilling love relationships.