I suddenly have this inspiration to write a post on how to maximise your dating journey after you have signed up with a dating agency, and tips that we, Dating Consultants, could not really tell the members upfront.  The truth is, we are humans after all and just like that nice server who would bring you extra servings at your favourite restaurant because you always smiled at him and was ever so polite, we would also go the extra mile for you….if you could just SMILE.

Honestly, we always start with the best intentions. On paper, we are supposed to treat each and every member the same; serve all with equal amount of attention, consistency and quality of matches. In reality, this continues to be a Vision that we will always strive for.

While I love many of my members for their appreciation, warmth and genuinity, many others have caused us to tear our hair up on more than one occasion. Here are the tips from the insiders – what your dating consultant will not tell you but feverishly hope you will know.

1) Treat your Dating Consultant with courtesy and decency. Basic rules of courtesy applies all the time. Do not raise your voice or spew vulgarities.  Don’t hang up on us before we have finished our conversation or be plain rude. We are not your slaves but we want to serve. 

2) Do not call every other day to enquire on your next date, when you have just went on one. We asured you we will not forget about you, and we will give you a call when we have the right match. Calling us all the time does not really translate into better matches for you, and only leaves us with the impression that you are very needy.

3) Do not bitch about your Dating Consultant or your agency when you go on dates. Many have not realised that doing so will leave their dates with a negative perception of them being whiny, non-appreciative and  complainy. Do not bite the hand that feeds you. If you have anything to bring up, go to the consultant and agency directly to resolve.

4) Do not insist on going to ONLY certain restaurants, especially if you are NOT the one paying for dinner. You can give suggestions on the type and kind of place you would like to go. But insistence leaves an impression that you are exacting and a control freak. Leave it to the middleman, your consultant, to arrange a place where both can be comfortable.

5) Do not change your dates at the very last minute.Noone likes to be stood up. After all that anticipation, being told last minute that your date can’t make it is such a letdown! Plus, this translates into additional work for your consultant who will need to reschedule the date, change the reservation and resent out the confirmations…. Yes this is what we are supposed to do, but hey, who would mind less for more?

6) Do try to call back when you said you would. We know you are busy, but it can be very frustrating when we emailed you, called you, sms-ed you….and there is no reply. And when you are available, you call us once and we couldn’t pick up the call, we are deemed as providing bad service. Work with us, let us know your schedule because we really want to make this work for you.

7) We are not perfect and we make mistakes sometimes. We truly seek your understanding and hope that you remain open-minded. Do not give up after just one date or event or use that as a gauge for future matches. Let your consultant know when things go wrong or right for you. Your appreciation really does wonders in encouraging your dating consultant to try her best for you.

 Everyone’s dating journey is unique. Do not compare or jump to a conclusion because you have heard from someone’s friend or colleague that the dating is going to be of a certain way. It is very demoralising for your consultant who is trying her best to help you, and on the other hand you are letting what you had hearsay color your experiences.

 At the end of the day, stay in open communication with your Dating Consultant. Respect her, Trust in her and give her the space to do her best for you. Appreciate her for what she has done and remind her of what is lacking. And trust me, when you do all that, the probability of you achieving your dating goals will significantly increased.
Happy Member = Happy Consultant = Happy Matches = Happy Ending! =) The Best Tip of All: Love yourself and others!